An artist is reborn after crisis; separating him from who he once was into the artist crisis has reborn him to be.

I use my tips from the tip jar to buy red lipstick

The tips from the tip jar make music with my lips

An overflowing tip jar for every kiss One lip to skin kiss of my red lips I bought with my tips

brain-sick.

One lip to lip kiss of top to bottom lucious red lips

love-sick.

Don't kiss those lovesick lips. 

Lets make music with these lips

Another dollar another kiss?

An overflowing tip jar means a red kiss upon your lips

Im hopeless without your tips

Oh I wish.....

Kiss kiss.

How do you Break the cycle . . . . locate the weak spots

To say I have changed from who I was a year ago from today is an understatement. I am a completely different person. I notice it in the way i eat, the way I think, the things I say and the time i take to make my point, it's obvious to me watching the people I hang around and the locations and situations I put myself in, most of the time its safe to say Im all about success baby. But the way I react... but the way I react... wait.. now thats a tough one. I said I notice that when I have a point to make I take the time to stop and think, analyze and go through all the possible solutions or arguments to make my case and most of the time, day to day, this works out fine, not always being correct of course, agreeing to disagree with others is okay too... But this is only true up until emotions are involved.

     Whoa, I can feel the weather change and the unexpected clouds roll into my brain-mosphere on that one. Those damn emotions get the best of me 9 times out of 10 I kid you not, and it's something I am well aware of, but does that give me the ability to change? Dont give me wrong, after a day of riding the revolving emotional rollercoaster sleep is out of the question, and the list of apologies starts flowing out of my ears by 1 a.m and next thing I know I'm up and out of bed with my sneakers on and a sweater, earplugs in running out the door for a late night run in the middle of San Francisco. Suicidal much? So what the heck can I do?

     I call my mom this afternoon, she answers softly, " hello?" "Maa, are you avoiding me?" I gesture with a big smile after calling her for a third time in two days to ask if I am emotionally dependendent on others, and if i had always been this way. "No." she responds shortly. "Okkay, well what are you doin then?" She responds with a whirlwind of a problem about her ex husband, Dad, knowing I have absolutely no interest in hearing about it, its dead to me, a lost cause, and thats when I realize exactly where I inhabited such emotionally driven tendencies and think to myself, What the hell am i doing calling you, I chuckle outloud and take a few moments to remember I am only half of her and that half can be rewired and the fog clears a bit and the day seems to get a little bit brighter. All in fun, back to the issue at hand, How do we build strong emotional intelligence if we are wired shut to be think emotionally?

      Emotional decision makers I tell you, in myexperience, were terrible; I mean we tell the best jokes, were always around for a good cry and we are AMAZING in bed, but when it comes down to taking space or being told were too needy or not logical its like kicking a bull in the face after you've calmed it down enough to get close. BAD IDEA. So, since we cant exactly wear a sign around our neck that says, "Avoid any conflict with me I am emotional and may not know how to express myself to you if you dont have a lifetime of patience to listen," we research!

    So here we are a few google searches deep .....

"How to be emotionally intelligent"
"Am I codependent"
"Long distance relationships"
"Explanation behind neediness"
"How important is affection"
"Why thinking rationally is important"
"How to think and make decisions rationally"
"Am I too young to be famous..."

....Okay you get the idea here

And a couple chapters into
Emotional Intelligendce 2.0 by Travis Bradberry
Being logical: aguide to good thinking D.Q. McInerny
Chemistry for Dummies
etc....

What I have gathered thus far- and I haven't by any means made a large enough dent- is ....

1. H.A.L.T !

Meaning do not respond to a conflict or try to reason, express your ideas, or argue with someone when you are:
Hungry
Angry
Lonley
or Tired

Where I got it:

Al-Anon and AA use this one for people in recovery, people dealing with addictive, addicted family members of alcohol, drugs etc. But I am doing exatly what picasso said and STEALING the idea for people that may be a little more emotional then others; and any logical person would back me on this one in saying when you are in any of these states, you're not thinking right girlfreind, get some lunch, relax, call them back in an hour or two and the problems will be a hell of a lot more minute then when you were running on fumes; thus avoiding a lot of emotional crap.

Long distance relationships: having a love affair with their brain .....

Gone are the days when you are having an argument with your significant other and they do that one cute thing with their face or eyes that make you forget what you were saying. It is pretty much just having a love affair with their brain, and if you can’t handle that then you should reconsider your position. Read More http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2012/10/5-things-nobody-tells-you-abou.html#ixzz28MrTnND4

 Communication and compromise.. .. will make all the difference in the world...

3. Make a future plan.

Ask your partner: Where do you see us in one year? How about five years? Talk about what each of you can do, in the context of living apart, that will make this future vision come true. Having shared goals is one of the keys to a happy relationship, and doing this activity subtly reminds each of you that you're working as a team. Living in separate homes does not mean you have to lead separate lives and have separate futures.

 

7. Be there for each other.

It's so very important for each of you to feel that the other one is there in the event of a family tragedy, a family celebration, or a personal crisis. Show her you care by flying home for her oral surgery, even though she says it's no big deal. Turn his cousin's wedding into an opportunity to relax together, even though he wasn't thinking he'd attend. Supporting each other through all those high and low points in life is reassuring to partners and strengthening for the relationship.

8. Keep reinventing the romance.

This is my favorite strategy, because it's the one that's the most fun and rewarding. Surprise your partner with a love letter or a gift. Send him a spontaneous email letting him know he's the sexiest man alive, or telling her you love her more now than the day you met her. Find creative -- and frequent -- ways to keep things spicy between you. Keep each other smiling!

The rest at http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-terri-orbuch/long-distance-relationships_b_1071108.html

why being who you are isn't being normal, its brilliant